Tuesday, December 6, 2011

I don't want to regret

I just read an article on the top five regrets of the dying.  They were put together by someone that worked with those dying.  I don't know how scientific these were gathered, but they are still are good to reflect upon.

1.  I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2.  I wish I didn't work so hard.
3.  I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.
4.  I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5.  I wish that I had let myself be happier.


Wow.  So here are my thoughts on each of these.....


1.  I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This is going to be my toughest one.  Where do you draw the line between being true to oneself and being selfish?  How do you find that balance?  I think as a parent, this is slightly limited.  You have others' lives to consider, especially if living a life true to oneself is much different than the one currently being lived.  Thought-provoking I tell you!


2.  I wish I didn't work so hard.

I have the opposite problem.  I don't work hard enough.  I need to be a better example of being a hard worker.  Not an obsessed worker, but a hard worker.  


3.  I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.

On this one, it totally depends on who I'm expressing those feelings with or about.  As I'm working on actually feeling to begin with, this will hopefully become something that I am good at.  


4.  I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

No problems with this one.  There are people that I don't have as frequent contact as I would like, but with the ease of technology, this isn't that big of a battle for me.


5.  I wish that I had let myself be happier.

Hmmmm.....another tough one.  I go through phases I think with it.  I really want to find happiness in what I do have, in what I have been blessed with.  Sometimes it is easier than others.  ;)



I would be interested to know more of the top things that those that are at the end of their lives wish they had done or had not done.  So for those that are more experienced in years than me, what would you add to the list?  

3 comments:

Debbie said...

I don't know that I would add much to that list...maybe, after I ponder it for awhile but I'm shooting straight from the hip now!

There's a lot of wisdom in those statements. I think one of the things that I realize that I'm trying to do more of, is serve others. There's something profound in getting outside of yourself. The Savior was right when He said to lose yourself in serving others and then you find yourself in the process. Very powerful.

Good post!
Love you!

Anonymous said...

I love these thoughts. Though I am not older than you, I have spent some time with the dying when I did my hospice capstone, and I think that these thoughts are pretty reflective of what a lot of people feel when faced with death.
Living a life true to yourself is hard. I spent so much of my life trying to do what everyone else thought that I should. I am in the process of letting that go, but it is a hard balance being true to yourself and being selfish. Mom's comment about service is right on...serving others is a powerful lesson in self-identity and humility. I always think I get more out of serving others than they do.

I think one thing that this article didn't echo was having a relationship with God. Not just going to church, but a genuine personal relationship. The people that I have seen at the end of their life that don't know Him are scared, and those that do seem to be filled with less regret and more peace.

Deep thoughts.....I am going to have to ponder some more. Love you. -Allison

Melissa said...

Wow I'm good...no regrets. Not that I'm ready to die...